669. Estrangement; Friendship
"Of the gradual abatement of kindness between friends the
beginning is often scarcely discernible by themselves, and the
process is continued by petty provocations, and incivilities
sometimes peevishly returned, and sometimes contemptuously
neglected, which would escape all attention but that of pride,
and drop from any memory but that of resentment."
Johnson: Pope (Lives of the Poets)
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884. Estrangement; Friendship
"The friendship which is to be practised or expected by common
mortals, must take its rise from mutual pleasure, and must end
when the power ceases of delighting each other."
Johnson: Idler #23 (September 23, 1758)
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885. Estrangement; Friendship
"Those who would gladly pass their days together may be separated
by the different course of their affairs; and friendship, like
love, is destroyed by long absence, though it may be increased by
short intermissions. What we have missed long enough to want it,
we value more when it is regained; but that which has been lost
till it is forgotten, will be found at last with little gladness,
and with still less if a substitute has supplied the place."
Johnson: Idler #23 (September 23, 1758)
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887. Estrangement; Friendship;
Insecurity
"Friendship is often destroyed by opposition of interest, not
only by the ponderous and visible interest which the desire of
wealth and greatness forms and maintains, but by a thousand
secret and slight competitions, scarcely known to the mind upon
which they operate. There is scarcely any man without some
favourite trifle which he values above greater attainments, some
desire of petty praise which he cannot patiently suffer to be
frustrated. This minute ambition is sometimes crossed before it
is known, and sometimes defeated by wanton petulance; but such
attacks are seldom made without the loss of friendship; for,
whoever has once found the vulnerable part will always be feared,
and the resentment will burn on in secret, of which shame hinders
the discovery."
Johnson: Idler #23 (September 23, 1758)
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888. Estrangement; Friendship
"Very slender differences will sometimes part those whom long
reciprocation of civility or beneficence has united."
Johnson: Idler #23 (September 23, 1758)
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889. Estrangement; Friendship
"The most fatal disease of friendship is gradual decay, or
dislike hourly increased by causes too slender for complaint, and
too numerous for removal. -- Those who are angry may be
reconciled; those who have been injured may receive a
recompense; but when the desire of pleasing and willingness to
be pleased is silently diminished, the renovation of friendship
is hopeless; as, when the vital powers sink into languor, there
is no longer any use of the physician."
Johnson: Idler #23 (September 23, 1758)
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